It has been nearly two years since I have blogged. When I said I'd do it again I was thinking a year tops, time sure does fly. I also recently started "letters to myself", it was my way of personal pep talks, things that I can read later to remind myself of things that everyone needs to remind themselves of. Which is also the reason for the following blog.
There is a saying everyone has heard... "sticks and stones can break my bones ,but words can never hurt me". This is utter insanity. Words can and do hurt as much as sticks and stones, in fact they hurt deeper. The injuries from sticks and stones will heal over tine but the injuries from words can stay with people for a life time.
I never really gave this much thought till recently. I've always tried to be a mentally and emotionally strong person. Yeah I have my triggers, fears, insecurities.. who doesn't? But I have also learned them and in a way I've become a "mistess of masks". The strength I've clung to for years got tested the past few months. When I relearned the hurt of words. I'm not going to overly spill my guts on it cause honestly there is still alot of personal healing going on. Instead, I think it's best to be shorter and give a few things to ponder.
1. Think about it first
I know.. 'easier said than done' is in your head. Which is true. But the reason for it is this... Words might come out easy but after said they might not be easily forgiven. I remember things even from childhood said to me that hurt. The tongue is at times our worse enemy and remember words are like toothpaste easy to get out impossible to put back.
I know.. 'easier said than done' is in your head. Which is true. But the reason for it is this... Words might come out easy but after said they might not be easily forgiven. I remember things even from childhood said to me that hurt. The tongue is at times our worse enemy and remember words are like toothpaste easy to get out impossible to put back.
2. Think about how you would feel.
So many wear the "nothing affects me" mask the most. In truth the most emotionally retrained are at times some of the most sensitive. A person can have a nothing can hurt me or i don't care what others think mentality, but most if they stop n really evaluate it do actually care. Which brings me to the number 2, if what you are about to say to someone would hurt you chances are it will hurt them. And in some cases hurt them to a point of not being able to fix it. If you value that friendship, relationship or whatever then consider the risk of what you want to say.
So many wear the "nothing affects me" mask the most. In truth the most emotionally retrained are at times some of the most sensitive. A person can have a nothing can hurt me or i don't care what others think mentality, but most if they stop n really evaluate it do actually care. Which brings me to the number 2, if what you are about to say to someone would hurt you chances are it will hurt them. And in some cases hurt them to a point of not being able to fix it. If you value that friendship, relationship or whatever then consider the risk of what you want to say.
3. There is no excuse for hurtful words.
So many will say "oh such n such was just upset". Which is plausible. However, instead of blowing up and releasing word toothpaste how bout taking a step back count to ten and breath. Then talk it out like adults. Especially if it's someone important to you.
So many will say "oh such n such was just upset". Which is plausible. However, instead of blowing up and releasing word toothpaste how bout taking a step back count to ten and breath. Then talk it out like adults. Especially if it's someone important to you.
Truthfully we are all guilty of hurtful words and chances are most have been on the receiving end to. Some more then their fair share. But if it is any comfort to those who have been hurt by words remember you are not alone. And remember just as words can hurt they can heal.
